As Blair left the church, she felt reborn. That is, until the proprietor of all things evil greeted her on the street. Chuck Bass rolled up next to her in the very limo Blair removed her chastity belt the night before. Chuck told her he'd been playing the memory of her purring in his ear all morning. Blair instructed him to erase the tape. What happened in the back of the limo was a one time thing. It shall never be spoken about again. End of story. Blair had other things to deal with. Like her 17th Birthday. All Blair wanted was to be reunited with Nate.
Blair decided not to tell her friends about their breakup because as far as she was concerned the beloved couple would be back together in no time. Their breakup was rash and a spur of the moment thing. It couldn't actually be done for good. Blair put a diamond necklace on hold at her favorite jewelry store. Every year Nate went to the store and bought her whatever was on hold. Blair was in for the excitement of her life when Nate finally called her. He told her he thought their breakup was hasty and impulsive. They could work things out. Nate said he'd be at her Birthday party that night. Blair was ecstatic. Blair quickly called the jeweler and, sure enough, the diamond necklace had been picked up! Her Birthday wishes were already coming true and she hadn't even blown a single candle out yet.
Little did Blair know, Nate's motive for getting back together was not very innocent. The Archibalds were in a bad place. With Nate's dad, the Captain, getting arrested and charged with embezzlement and fraud, the Archibald dynasty was quickly crumbling. But the one thing that could possibly salvage the family name? Keeping the Captain's biggest client, Eleanor Waldorf, from firing him. If Eleanor stood by the Captain then they would all seem like a united front. Nate told his parents he and Blair broke up but his mother was persistent on Nate finally giving the family ring to Blair. Nate's father needed him. And rather than giving up his father's head, Nate took the sort of easy way out, and decided he would take Blair Waldorf's hand instead.
Families on the Upper East Side aren't the only dysfunctional ones. It appears those in Brooklyn are just as messed up. Little Jenny Humphrey took it in her own hands to bring her mother, Alison, back to the city. Without her father, Rufus, knowing. And boy was Rufus surprised when Alison showed up at his doorstep. Jenny was hoping her parents could figure stuff out. It was hard to tell who was less excited to see Alison: Rufus or Dan. Dan was shocked to see his mother standing in the loft. He was pretty mad at her. Alison had said she'd be back at the end of the summer and then never came home. A lot had been going on with the Humphreys and Alison didn't even seem to care. While the kids ran off for the night, Rufus and Alison were left alone. The two argued over Alison leaving the family. Her whole life had been dedicated to Rufus' career. Alison told him she had to leave for herself. Rufus embraced and told her he still cared about their relationship. The two started kissing and well, I won't horrify you with the details but let's just say old people are just as outrageous as teens.
Dan was heated over his mother's return to Brooklyn. And when Dan Humphrey got upset the person he always turned to was his best friend of like forever, Vanessa. Dan told Vanessa all about his mother's coming back and how it made him feel. Vanessa was happy to listen because that's just what friends were for. As they were finishing up their talk, Dan got a text from Serena who was already at Blair's party. Vanessa kind of groaned. Dan was confused. I mean, he likes Serena and he likes Vanessa and Serena likes him and Vanessa likes him so why can't Serena and Vanessa like each other? Vanessa said she could like Serena and be nice to her and she could start that very night. At that girl Blair's Birthday party. Dan was hesitant. Vanessa should dip a toe in, not jump in head first off a cliff into the rocks, in shark infested waters. But Vanessa wanted to at least try to get to know Serena. She knew how to swim and was ready to do this.
Once at Blair's Birthday party, Nate was nowhere to be seen. Blair assured everyone Nate would be there any moment. But you know who was there? Why, Chuck, of course. He was doing his usual creepy lurking around thing. But instead of trying to find the drunkest and easiest girl at the party, his eyes were solely on Blair. Blair and Chuck confronted each other on the balcony, far away from the other partygoers. Chuck told her to give up on Nate. He wasn't coming. It was over. Chuck then he confessed that he couldn't sleep and his stomach felt weird, like it was fluttering whenever he thought of Blair. Blair stopped dead in her tracks. Chuck had butterflies?!? No way. Chuck Bass did not get butterflies over girls. Especially not over his best friend's ex girlfriend after a one night stand. This was not happening. Blair demanded him to kill those butterflies ASAP. Chuck told her the only reason Nate was getting back together with her was to save his family. Blair didn't believe it. Nate loved her. But if he loved her so much why wasn't he at the party? Chuck and Blair made a bet. If Nate called Blair by midnight, Chuck would leave her alone forever. If not, she had to spend another night with him. Both sides were certain they would win. It was on!
Serena was surprised to see Dan arrive at the party with Vanessa in tow. Blair was even more surprised to learn that was Dan's oldest, bestest friend. Vanessa was hot! Serena may need to be nervous about Dan and Vanessa's close relationship. This Vanessa girl could be a major threat. Serena and Vanessa challenged each other to a little Guitar Hero competition. Serena smoked Vanessa in her amazing rendition of Lynyrd Skynyrd's Free Bird (just another thing SVDW does perfectly--life is so unfair!). As Serena put her guitar down, Vanessa revealed that Dan had been having a bad day. You know, with his mom coming home and all. Serena was taken aback. Dan's mom was back? And she didn't know about it? But Vanessa did? Dan and Serena stepped aside and talked it out. Serena seemed jealous of Vanessa. She's beautiful and funny and smart. Dan assured her Vanessa was just his best friend. It's Serena who he really likes and wants to be with.
A little later, Vanessa apologized to Serena for being a bit hard on her. The only reason she's come off strong is because she is protective of Dan. Serena admitted too that she's been kind of weird to Vanessa because she's protective of her relationship with Dan. This has been her first real one. And she's a tad bit intimidated by Vanessa. I mean, Vanessa has so much in common with Dan. They have history. The girls finally eased up. They even joked about a rematch in Guitar Hero. Dan approached the girls as they were having a real bonding moment. He was happy to see that two of the most important women in his life were finally getting along.
Little did Blair know that while she waited anxiously for Nate to arrive at the party, he was elsewhere. With someone else. As Nate got to Blair's Birthday, holding his family ring, he was met by Jenny. She was also about to go into the party but had hesitations. Jenny and Blair were still on the outs after Jenny blurted to her about what happened at the masked ball. Nate asked Jenny if she'd want to go somewhere else, away from the party. Jenny obliged and the two went off together. They had a nice heart to heart. Revealing that they both really just needed to get out of their houses that night. Seemed like both their families were having some troubles. Jenny and Nate were genuinely happy to have each other to talk to.
When they went to say goodbye however, one of my excellent spies caught them hugging. She quickly snapped a shot of them and sent it right my way. And then I did my duty and blasted it out for all to see. Poor Blair. It really messed up her Birthday. She was in hysterics but it wasn't like Nate was cheating on her. Blair and Nate were broken up. He could be with anyone if he wanted. Blair confronted Serena and told her the truth about the breakup. It was over. Serena tried to comfort her but Blair just wanted to be left alone. The Birthday girl all alone on her Birthday. Utterly tragic if you ask me. When Nate arrived home, he gave his parents back the family ring. He told them it was over with him and Blair. The Captain tried to plead with Nate but he didn't want to hear any of it. Nate's dad dug his own grave and now he had to lie in it.
Jenny made her way back to Brooklyn. Once at the loft she was greeted by a pretty unsettling scene. But for some reason Jenny was ecstatic. She found her parents on the living room floor wrapped in a blanket with candles burning throughout (I bet Sade was playing in the background too). Ew!! Um hello, major psychological damage! But I guess Jenny was just happy to have her family all together again, under one roof. Weird. Really, really weird. But glad to see the Humphreys working through their problems. Congrats!
As Blair cried in a room, Chuck found her. Blair really didn't feel up to dealing with a gloating Chuck. He was right about Nate. She didn't want to hear him rub it in. But surprisingly, Chuck didn't want to do that. He actually wanted to give Blair a gift. Chuck held out a box and Blair opened it. It was the diamond necklace she had put on hold at the jewelry store. Blair was shocked. She couldn't take this. Chuck insisted and put it on her. He told her it looked beautiful. And once again, that's all Blair needed to hear. The pair started making out ferociously on the bed. Damn, these two are heating it up (guess that's what happens when you play with fire). You'd think in a world where so much goes on behind closed doors people would learn to actually fully shut them. But, no. As Blair and Chuck made out, the door was left ajar. And who happened to walk by and sneak a peak at the hot couple? Serena van der Woodsen. Serena stood paralyzed as she watched her BFF, Blair Waldorf, make out with her arch nemesis, Chuck Bass. Talk about a shocker!
Now that Serena knows about Blair and Chuck what is she going to do? I mean, Serena's not one to gossip but Blair and Chuck?!? Come on! That's like the craziest thing to happen on the UES in a very, very long time. And now that Blair and Chuck have spent not one, but two nights together is this something more than just casual sex? Who knows. This is so unlike Blair; to lose her virginity to her ex boyfriend's best friend, Chuck Bass, after being broken up for like two seconds. And this is even more unlike Chuck; to have sex with someone and actually care about them. Guess Blair got the biggest gift of all on her Birthday: Chuck, the gift that keeps on giving. Happy Birthday, B! One year older but not necessarily the wiser.
you know you love me,
2 comments:
Great recap of the episode. I love how you made the names bold. Awesome blog...bye!
I'm glad you like it...and pudding. Yummy!
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